The CMSA Christmas Tournament has become a prime player recruiting opportunity for unscrupulous coaches who target talented children along with their unsuspecting parents. If you listened closely you could hear it, "Our program will provide opportunity for your son to achieve his fantastic potential on a winning team." To the uneducated soccer parent, or even the educated soccer spectator, the thought of missing an "opportunity" is troublesome to say the least. The number of "great opportunities" that are presented to players has become so ridiculous that a feeling of panic and uncertainty overtakes parents when their son or daughter is not recruited. "It makes my daughter feel so good when she is recruited, she's been hurt by this," said one dad I spoke to, after his daughter was not one of a chosen few on her team to be approached by the coach of a popular academy team in Calgary during the recent tournament. Unfortunately, I think parents can be just as hurt.

CMSA officials have their hands tied when it comes to the unethical recruiting of players. There is only one rule: You are not permitted to recruit for the current season. There is no mention of the next season however. At a recent meeting of Calgary technical directors, the recruiting issue was 'front and center' on the agenda. We came up with several recommendations that will eventually find their way onto the desk of CMSA, and with luck - and pressure from parents, perhaps the recommendations will make it to a vote. Among the recommendations:

• The creation of two formal recruiting periods each year - each lasting no more than four weeks, during which club registration will be completed
• A limit of three contacts with a recruited player - direct contact, e-mail, telephone messages, tournament invitations, practice invitations and hard copy written correspondence all constitute "contact" with a player
• A parent or guardian must be present during any discussion with a player regarding a change of club
• Waiving of fees, partial waiving of fees, or offers of "scholarships" are not permitted except in cases of financial hardship, and details and approval for such funding must be presented in writing from the club to which the player is being recruited
• A no-recruiting period, lasting at least ten months of the year, during which it is a rule violation to recruit a player
• A reporting procedure where proven violations to recruiting guidelines result in a club being fined, and the recruiting coach receiving a suspension
• An open house night at the Calgary Soccer Centre where clubs can set up a booth and answer questions and provide information about available programs

Recently one of our Foothills boys teams experienced the loss of three key players to serious injury, all of them requiring surgery. Added to this, they lost their coach to serious illness. Added to this, they lost some games. I hosted a parent meeting to address the situation. Following the parent meeting, I received this e-mail from one of the parents, which read in part:

I have sat in the stands and listened to the armchair coaches (and have to admit have succumbed on occasion myself), where the general focus is around the individual player rather than what is in the best interests of the team. It is obvious in the stands and many times it manifests itself on the field when players put their interests ahead of the team's interests. As parents we sometimes confuse our interests with our kid's interests and that is often where things break down. Parental intentions are most often good, however, the delivery usually leaves something to be desired when emotion is what drives it. Sadly I've been there; hopefully I learned something from it.

I recognize there are short term and long term goals and quite frankly I think players and people in general learn more about themselves from adversity than continual smooth sailing. There is a common theme in sports; that you can't get to the top without suffering some significant loss or setback along the way. Consider this time as a watershed moment where the character of this Foothills team will become obvious if they take the time to think about it. They (players) will be committed to going forward (or they will leave) and this will provide us with a firm foundation to build a team upon and ultimately get to the top.

This parent knows that players are the raw ingredients in the recipe for every team. That mixing the ingredients together in the correct proportions, adding patience, time, good coaching and commitment produces a great team. That great teams create their own opportunities, providing a return on each player's investment that far exceeds the sum of the individual investments. That there is great value in sticking around and creating your own opportunity instead of shopping around for quick fix opportunities elsewhere. This parent has very fortunate children, and his son is learning to create his own opportunities in life as well as in sport.

Adherence to a good club program and team provides valuable life lessons like working through peaks and valleys in performance, and developing tolerance and appreciation for others. Parents who encourage their child to stick with a good club, as opposed to constantly looking for a "fresh start" or "quick fix" somewhere else, are teaching valuable lessons. Lessons that will result in children who learn to trust, who are independent, who are loyal and who develop friends and relationships that last a lifetime. Most importantly we will develop youth who will transition into young men and women who can meet the challenges of life with confidence and the determination to make things work.

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